By Mack Rights, Rochester, New York
I’m always coming up with political commercials that I would love to see but know that I never will because the Republican Party’s run by a bunch of castrated wimps who find it hard to even win at shadow boxing.
On the other hand, the Democrat Party’s even worse. They have to appoint minorities now just so they can cry “racism” as soon as anyone points to their incompetence. Obama’s girl at the United Nations is Susan Rice. The Sunday after the 11th anniversary of 911 and the day that al Qaeda lit up a bunch of US embassies and killed an ambassador and three others in Libya, Susan Rice came out on the Sunday talk shows and explained that these weren’t terrorists. How could they be? Obama killed bin Laden, so all the other terrorists gave up and went home out of fear of Obama, who was up for reelection as the first president who tamed the world’s Muslims into little lambs. Hear that terrorists? – Obama turned you all into a bunch of happily-burped babies air-swimming on your bellies looking forward the next diaper change.
Susan Rice actually said that these attacks on our embassies in several nations with guns and rocket propelled grenades were spontaneous protests over a video on the Youtube that no one had ever seen. It’s supposedly a video that tells about Mohamed, and even though no one had ever seen or heard of it, we were supposed to believe that a bunch of illiterate and unemployed camel jockeys in the war-torn Middle East actually had enough money to afford a computer and the internet connection to see this video. Anyone who believes that nonsense is just a downright-uneducated-mentally-deficient-slipped-through-the-cracks fool. And I pity the fool. If you’re not that kind of fool, you must either accept that our UN ambassador is indeed that kind of fool or that she was lying to hide something.
Obama was up for reelection, and his campaign was run on his having nationalized the auto industry on behalf of the unions that had bankrupted it in the first place and his having killed bin Laden who was hunkered down with a sticky stash of porn and a fuzzy black and white TV. In other words, Obama wanted us to believe that he had ended the world’s need to worry about terrorism, but it doesn’t take a desk jockey with above-average intelligence to figure out that Susan Rice was actually in charge of hiding the fact that Obama had not ended terrorism. Imagine that. Obama, the messiah, has failed to end terrorism. I’m speechless.
So when Republicans drew attention to her lies or idiocy- whichever she ultimately admits to- the Democrats started to hide behind their favorite word: RACISM. The Democrats are just a bunch of persistently lying America-hating rats who couldn’t come up with an excuse for their incompetence if they were forced to do it at gunpoint. The charge of racism is all they’ve got.
So when charged with incompetence, they turn it around and claim that those making the charge are being racist for actually thinking that Susan Rice should be held up to the same standards as anyone else that would be appointed to such a high position in government. Did you get that black America? The Democrats in this country think that blacks in America are all too dumb to actually be held up to the same standards by which we would normally judge someone to be competent. In other words, over 90% of blacks in America vote obediently for the party that thinks they are incompetent simply because they are black and that they shouldn’t be judged by their character- only by the color of their skin.
But that’s another story. Here’s the upcoming story. Now, I don’t know if Obama will actually appoint Susan Rice to be the next Secretary of State. He might not want her up on Capitol Hill answering the questions of those who’d like to find out if she really is competent. But, word around the oil-drum fire in the land of Obamavilles is that Obama wants her to replace Hilary Clinton who’s had it with Obama’s incompetence and wants off the sinking ship.
Personally, I don’t care if she becomes Secretary of State. The State Department is nothing more than the United Nations’ wing of the American government. It’s the part we allow to be run by the dictators and radical Muslims whom our Secretary of Defense is in charge of killing. The State Department is in charge of hobbling our Defense Department so that America’s enemies can buy time to hatch their plans- whatever plans they’ve cooked up in any given month. So I don’t really care who’s the Secretary of State- the more incompetent the better, as far as I’m concerned. I honestly can’t name one of them, under any political administration, that actually advocated for America’s best interests. Even Condi Rice was an occasional moral relativist in charge of asking Israel to be willing to commit national suicide so we could get the whiney and useless Palestinians to shut up for one second. Sadly, of all the Secretaries of State in my lifetime, I consider her the best.
Think about it, even Henry Kissinger was a commie-loving toad who opened up Red China so that they could employ slave labor to lower the costs of American manufacturing. Then we replaced the tax dollars that would have come from the incomes of Americans in the manufacturing sector with borrowed dollars from the same Chinese government that owns the means of production and therefore the rights to the profits. Again, that’s another story.
If it’s true that Susan Rice is to be our next Secretary of State, this is the commercial I want to see. It’s a funny commercial that will get folks’ attention and teach liberals a little bit about being a minority in America.
It starts by fading from a high ceiling into an Octagon fighting ring with a baby grand piano in the center. Condoleezza Rice is playing a classical jam on the piano. Then the camera comes down and focuses on her face. She puts her cigar into the ashtray on the piano and says:
Susan Rice wants to be the first black woman Democrat Secretary of State, but the Republicans think she might be incompetent. The Democrats say that’s racist.
On the 11th anniversary of 911, a bunch of al Qaeda and Muslim Brotherhood radicals attacked several of our Middle East embassies in order to honor their beloved Osama bin Laden. Susan Rice said that this wasn’t terrorism but just a spontaneous protest over a Youtube video that no one had ever seen or heard about. If you think that a bunch of barbarians without electricity were monitoring the Youtube without internet access, then you are indeed incompetent. You can’t claim otherwise.
So if you think that’s racist, let me tell you about my time at State. By the way, I was the first black Secretary of State Rice, and now I’m a big deal at Stanford University. When I was appointed to be Secretary of State by President George W. Bush, the liberals that support the Democrat Party called me “House Nigga” and all sorts of other nasty names. Are the Republicans calling you “House Nigga” sister?
Listen up. I grew up in the south. My classmate Denise was killed when the Democrats bombed the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church in 1963. My father, Rev. Rice, had guns, and he kept them loaded and stood guard while I practiced piano. If it were up to the forefathers of your party Susan Rice and to the KKK, those guns would have been confiscated. That’s racism girl.
I didn’t get to where I am because I was black and because I cried racism every time someone didn’t like me. I got here despite the fact that I’m a black Republican.
So if you want to be Secretary of State, come prove your worth. Meet me in the Octagon. We’ll sell Pay Preview tickets. If you win, you get my blessing and the Pay Preview profits will go to the next Democrat Presidential candidate’s campaign. If I win, you bow out and the profits go to the next Republican Presidential candidate.
In the meantime sister, quit whining racism. You’re making black people look weak. Who wants to hire a black person whom you can’t fire for incompetence without being called a racist? Unemployment in the black community is already too high. You’re not helping. I’M the reigning Secretary of State Rice.
With that, Condi picks up her cigar, takes a puff, blows a cloud of smoke and says, “Meet me in the Octagon.” And of course, the classical music continues throughout the whole commercial. She never stops playing.
I know, I know, we’ll probably never see it happen. Condi hasn’t returned my call. But tell me that wouldn’t be awesome. That’s how you deal with the Democrats.